Monday, November 7, 2011

Chad's First Post

And for my first post . . .
Hot Guys in Doublets, Part 7.

Just kidding.There is absolutely no way. I don’t judge guys’ attractiveness, nor am I really sure what a doublet is.
So instead...

Confessions of a Repentant Non-blogger.
By Chad Morris

Hey everyone. I’m Chad, the husband of the amazingly funny, insightful, and entertaining Shelly. That’s really all I have to say after as introductions go. I know my place in her shadow.
I love to write, but I’ve avoided blogging for a long time. I think it might have something to do with the word blog. I’m not sure if it sounds ominous, painful, or just plain boring. If I had to define the word just by the sound of it, it would either be . . .

Blog: (a combination of the words bog and blah) n. Writing that makes readers feel like they are wallowing through a mire of meaningless babble. (Ex: After reading her blog, and seeing the thirty-seventh picture of her infant’s toes, my eyes glazed over and I spent the rest of the year in an intellectual coma.)

Or . . .

Blog: (a combination of the words bludgeon and flog) n. Writing that makes readers feel like they have been knocked senseless, beaten to a mental pulp. (Ex: After reading his blog of rants, I felt like I had been clubbed over the head with ignorance, kung fu kicked by overstated opinions, and slapped in the mouth by bad taste.)

Or . . .

Blog: n. the name of an evil monster in a comic book or on a cartoon, which is likely made of sludge, goop, or grime, and may have the ability swallow entire towns whole. (Ex: When a vat of toxic waste spilled into the polluted swamp, the blog came to life . . . and ate all the hot guys in doublets.)

THE BLOG!—it could easily be the name of an upcoming horror film. Any of the above definitions would allow for this interpretation.

Maybe it is not a very good idea to try to define words by the way they sound. (I know unfortunate words like afflatus, crapulous, and turdiform would be grateful.) According to the dictionary, blog is actually short for weblog. That makes more sense.

So, long story short, I went to a writing conference, and several presenters pounded home the point that I need to blog if I have any hopes or dreams of breaking through as a writer. Turns out my amazing wife was already seventeen steps ahead of me, (nothing new there) and she invited me to join up with her. So, I’m going to face the monster. Every Monday and Thursday I’ll post something new (that may or may not include meaningless babble, overstated opinions, and toxic monsters). And Shelly will continue to interview people on her couch, post hot guys in doublets, and her other hilarious ramdomness on Tuesdays and Fridays. And the other days . . . we’ll just see what happens.


  1. Welcome Chad, happy to 'meet' you. At least I am now I know you're leaving the hot guys to Shelly :-)

  2. Blog is an ugly word, but I just can't think of a better one. You would think with all the writers in the world we could think of something.

    I love Shelly, so if she picked you, you must be awesome too :)

  3. Sarah - great to "meet" you too. And I'll definitely leave the doublets to Shelly.

    Angela - Yeah, it's an ugly word. And thanks for the compliment--I'm awesome by association. That happens all the time.

    Robin - "waves" back at ya. Shelly said she loved your book. Hope to hear of a large contract soon.

  4. Hey Chad! Welcome to the blogging world! I hope you enjoy it as much as a pig wallowing in the mud. . .or something like that.

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