By release date:
click on the titles to watch bits of the actual movies
Garbage Pail Kids: The Movie
-Oh, I've got one. You know those stickers that kids collect
of Cabbage Patch Kids gone wrong? We could make that into a movie!
-Like a cartoon?
-No dude, LIVE ACTION!
-I swear if you weren't the studio exect's son...
This might have been what killed cute little McKensie Astin's career.
Troll 2
(This text is taken from The Former 786's blog post on unrelated sequels- Thanks man!)
Original: Believe it or not, there are two characters named Harry Potter in this 1986 horror film (JK was a big fan, I guess). It tells the story of a troll king who possesses a little girl and wreaks havoc on a San Francisco apartment complex. Troll was actually a straightforward horror film and did pretty well at the box office.
This Sequel: One of the most interesting things about Troll 2 is that there are no trolls in the movie. None. The movie is all about a group of vegetarian goblins who live in an isolated town and attract new prey through house swapping. The film was directed by Drake Floyd (aka Claudio Fragasso) who felt they could piggyback on the success of the first movie by using the name, even though there was absolutely no association between the two films. This is probably the most unrelated sequel out there today and it's possibly one of the worst films of all time.
Battlefield Earth
Once upon a time I worked in the movie theater and it was one of my favorite jobs ever (can you say 'all you can eat movie popcorn and free movies'?)One night we got a sneak peek at Battlefield Earth.
I sat there at midnight (I had nothing better to do that night) with my friends and free popcorn (did I already mention that part?) ready for anything. Anything but that.
I didn't pay for it, I had no expectations, I had NOTHING BETTER TO DO (did I mention this already?) I could even heckle it if I wanted (it was just staff), but I still left about 30 minutes in. I wasn't tired. It was just bad. I really am at a loss for words to describe it.
It was so bad that the screenwriter actually apologized last year. He blamed it on wanting to meet Scientology women. This explains so much...
There are some real turkeys out there. This isn't the first blog to list Battlefield Earth.
ReplyDeleteIt seems like we've all seen Battlefield Earth . . . but some the others . . . I am so thankful I didn't see them too.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad I've never seen these movies. Troll 2 sound horrible!
ReplyDeleteHaha, I bet that's exactly how the movie got made. Darn you nepotism.
ReplyDeleteI actually liked GPK: The Movie. I know...weird. The rest I agree with though. :P
ReplyDeleteI doubt he met many women by writing that awful movie!
ReplyDeleteThanks for participating in my blogfest.
I have actually never heard of any of them! But how funny that characters are named Harry Potter in that Troll movie!
ReplyDeleteHaHa! I did this blogfest too! I sort of went a little crazy, but I'm jealous that I forgot about Battlefield Earth! LOL
ReplyDeleteGreat (or bad?) choices!
ReplyDeleteSo many bad movies running around the blogosphere! :) Great post.
ReplyDeleteI'm happy to report I haven't actually seen any of these, lol! I did enjoy reading why I should never see them in the future!
ReplyDeleteApparently Battlefield: Earth is like the worst movie ever made! A lot of people have it on their lists. Glad I haven't seen it lol.
ReplyDeleteBattlefield Earth has hit so many lists today! I find it amazing that the screenwriter said he did it for women. Does that work?
ReplyDeleteOh my gosh, they all look and sound so awful! Who would have thought there were this many terrible movies out there. Especially the Garbage Pail Kids. Are you kidding me?
ReplyDeleteThis was the first blog post I have come across that mention Battlefield Earth. I have read some of the others and was like, "have you not seen - or did you actually like - Battlefield Earth?" My old roommate took it home one night from the used video store he worked at we got maybe 20 minutes into it before we just couldn't take it any more.
ReplyDeleteOh my gosh! I remember Garbage Pail Kids :) Yikes, what a disaster!
ReplyDeleteNever saw them, thankfully.
ReplyDeleteAND YES we can still be friends.
Battlefield Earth made my list as well. The other two I didn't have the displeasure of seeing!
ReplyDeleteGreat list, many have Troll 2. I guess that says a lot about that movie. :)
ReplyDelete"He blamed it on wanting to meet Scientology women. This explains so much..." Wow... *shakes head whilst snickering*
ReplyDeleteI love your tale of "watching" Battlefield Earth. Spot-on! The Engineer and I are sci-fi fans. And fans of heckling cheesy sci-fi movies. We made it about 10 minutes into this one and decided our time should not be squandered on something so atrocious. If I hadn't been in pain (tore up my meniscus this weekend) this would have been on my list as well. I only made it to six movies, then had to go to bed. I think you'll find, like I did, that this movie made a LOT of these lists ;-)
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for stopping by my place!
Tina @ Life is Good
I knew Battlefield earth would be a very bad movie even from the trailers...John Ravolta's hair alone says volumes:) I wonder though if it is so bad gotta watch it for fun like Plan 9 From Outer Space, Attack of the Killer Shrews, any Godzilla film(Gotta love Mothra with the tiny singing gals). Would it belong in that wondrous realm of crap?
ReplyDeleteOh wow I had forgotten about Garbage Pail Kids. LOL What a heinous flick that was. I absolutely agree with your other selections as well. Great post!
ReplyDeleteOh, wow, I think your bad movies beat my bad movies by a mile. Truly atrocious.
ReplyDeletewho pays to make such garbage? altho battlefield earth was hilariously bad!
ReplyDeleteExcellent list, Shelly Brown! Those movies all deserve to be on this list.
ReplyDeleteI watched Battlefield Earth with Rifftrax and it was STILL painful. And while I admit that I liked the cards, making a movie of the Garbage Pail kids was a bad idea from the start.
Finally, thanks for the quote. I'm sorry that one joke link isn't working (house swapping). Sometimes that happens. I'll fix it on my site.
Great post.
All awful especailly Battlefield Earth, cringe at the sight of that.
ReplyDeleteHilarious - I was stupid enough years ago when garbage pail kids first became available again ...stupid enough to buy it. Oh gosh that was some of the most wasted money I ever spent.
ReplyDeleteI still have no idea why John Travolta agreed to do that movie. And thankfully enough, I'm glad not to have watched the other ones.
ReplyDeleteMy favorite job in high school was also working at a movie theater as a popcorn girl! Great motivation behind Battlefield Earth! Julie
ReplyDeleteI find that apology for writing Battlefield Earth quite funny.
ReplyDelete