I'm trying something new today, can you tell?
I'm doing my very first blogfest. I'm not sure that I even know what that means but I followed the instructions found on The World Is My Oyster and I think I am supposed to blog a joke.
So in college I had this good friend named Pete and one day he asked me if I wanted to go and audition for this sketch comedy troupe. I asked what I needed to audition with and he told me that the fliers said we could 'come as we are'. So we went dressed as crocodiles. I wish! We just went in jeans and t-shirts. We arrived early to get a feel for what was expected of us and figured out that 'come as you are' means 'come up with something right now.' Pete was nervous but excited and decided he would do his Elvis impression and asked me what else he should do. I was grilling my brain (nice visual don't you think) for anything and everything funny that was up there. But the danger was that I was doing this while watching people prat fall, quote Tommy Boy, and yell general craziness. They looked like fools and I began weighing my odds to whether I would fare much better. My decision was that, if I tried, I was doomed to equal foolishness. Pete was not so easily dissuaded. He was going to do his Elvis impression (did I mention that he was from England and had a strong accent) and kept pestering me for more ideas. So I told him to tell this joke (see below) and HE GOT IN THE GROUP! They auditions kids for 3 straight hours, only took 3 boys total, and he got in on an Elvis impression and the aforementioned joke. This joke is that good! (Long intro I know but it will be SO worth it)
A duck walked into a bar and asked the bartender, "Got any duck food?" The bartender responded, "We don't serve duck food here." The duck dropped his little duck head and walked out of the bar.
The next day the duck walked back into the bar and asked the bartender, "Got any duck food?" The bartender responded, "Didn't you hear me yesterday? We don't serve duck food here." Chagrinned, the duck waddled out.
The next day the duck walked back into the same bar and asked the bartender, "Got any duck food?" The bartender looked at him for a minute and then said, "Look, I don't want to tell you again. We don't serve duck food here. We don't even serve ducks here. Come into this bar again and ask for duck food and I'm going to nail your feet to the floor." The duck shrugged and left without incident.
The next day the duck waddled himself right up to the same bar. The bartender looked at him warily. "Got any nails?" the duck asked.
"No," said the befuddled bartender.
"Good. Got any duck food?"
Was I right or was I right? Best joke ever!
I don't think I can ever think about that joke without hearing Pete's british accent
("Gawt any duck foo'd")
and you better believe that I auditioned for the same group the next year
(with something already prepared- dug out that crocodile suit)
and made it in.
Comedy is such a fickle friend.