Don't you just love these?
I may or may not be the only person
who uses this
(typically) superfluous word
but,
JUST in case I'm not,
keep your eyes open
and your Find and Replace ready
for
SEEMS or SEEMED
Example:
She looked at Marie who seemed to be breathing
harder.
Well, was she or wasn’t she?
Instead try-
She looked at Marie who was breathing harder.
(side note: In most cases you could also take off
the She looked and just make it: Marie
was breathing hard.)
Of course there are some cases where the POV
character can't decide what they are seeing and then perhaps seem/seemed would
be appropriate but look at each one carefully.
A few more examples:
When they reached the end of the tunnel they seemed to
have to pry their way out
When they reached the end of the tunnel they pried their
way out.
He stood which seemed harder than he anticipated
He stood which was harder than he anticipated.
You all know how to use Find and Replace, right?
Well search out your seems and get your word
count down, your sentences tighter,
and just have a fun ol' time!
Editing.
Jolly good fun!
Spot on!
ReplyDelete:D
This is a great tip. If it fits the scene, you could also go a step further and make it more active: "Marie breathed hard." *off to find 'seem' in my document* :)
ReplyDeleteYES! I wasn't using a critical enough editing-eye in my editing post. *face palm*
DeleteI have to use find and replace with the word "that". Good lawd, how many times can one writer use "that"? Apparently, according to my writing, quite a bit!
ReplyDeleteYes! I use those a lot in that first draft and then have to search the dang things out.
ReplyDeleteI just checked--45 "seems" in my MS. I will get in there and annihilate them! I also use "just" a lot.
ReplyDeleteIf I'm not mistaken the past tense of breathe is brothe, I seem to think.
ReplyDelete"Marie brothe hard." Yes, yes, I'm quite sure. ;)
Good advice! Another one that's easy to cut is "felt." It's always nice when you can find easy fixes like that! ;)
ReplyDeletePerfect tip! I totally struggle with that too :)
ReplyDeleteSeems to me that I need to get around and do this ;)
ReplyDeleteGreat tip! That's a big one in my list that needs to be edited out.
ReplyDeleteI am so guilty of this.
ReplyDeleteExcellent tip! I use Find and Replace a lot when editing. :)
ReplyDeleteOff to go find my seems. ;)
ReplyDeleteSeems to me that you should give us more of these tips!
ReplyDelete