Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Shelly's Therapy Hour: Leigh Covington



Today on the couch we have the effervescent Leigh Covington. She’s kinda new to blogging and I think I might be able to shake her of her penchant for writing. At least long enough to get her to fix dinner for her kids.

Welcome Leigh

Hello Shelly. So good to be here today. This couch isn’t as comfy as I thought it would be. Maybe I’m a little nervous.

No, I make the couch uncomfortable on purpose. It keeps the sessions short.

Abby how long have you been writing?

It depends on what kind of writing you’re talking about. I loved writing stories and poems all through school. I write plays and skits for church sometimes. I have been dabbling in the novel/picture book industry for a few years, but I only “came out of the closet” about three months ago.

Good for you for coming out. Now I can help you. Keeping secrets like this will just build and build until you become a crazy cat lady.

Church plays are just a gateway drug to nutty novel writing. You’ve learned that, haven’t you?

Unfortunately, yes.

What exactly do you write?

I’m all over the board! I write YA books and picture books. I thought about MG, but I’m not sure if it’s for me.

Because you forgot the S. MSG’s are for EVERYBODY. Picture books, huh? Did you know that most children under the age of 5 can’t read?

That is just a rumor. They can all read. Sometimes they hide it so their parents will read to them. It promotes family “togetherness.”

Sneaky devils. But adults don’t believe that they can read. Do you find this to be possibly detrimental to your writing career?

Well, hopefully their secret reading skills will soon come to light. However, if the picture book industry ever goes under, hopefully my YA books will save me from extinction. You may have to hook me up with some xanax in the meantime though.

I’m beginning to think that you are here so that I can ‘hook you up.’ I’m not actually licensed, you know that right? If I had gone through the trouble to get licensed I would be charging SO much more.

Back to your problems. Do you think that there should be a bigger push for literacy among these ages?

Picture book ages? Of course. I could hardly be a writer (or a reader) if I didn’t. I actually tutored kids with the Americorp Vista program for a while. It was fun. Reading is an amazing thing and important in everyone’s life. I love seeing a kids face light up when he starts to figure out the words and read his/her first book.

I volunteered with America Reads, a literacy program, where I was teaching inner-city 3rd graders their ABC’s. Crazy, huh?!?!

But I regret every minute of it. For all I know they have all become writers and will be sitting here on my couch while I try to undo all the work I put in. **shakes fist in the air** Darn those government programs!

Speaking of which, exactly how much government money do you think should be spent on making babies literate? Please use round to the nearest nickel.

Babies? Ah, probably nothing.  But I won’t lie… those commercials with babies reading, fascinate me. Although… in a perfect world, I would wish that every child (or person) for that matter could have a stellar library of their own. Awesome books = lots of reading, right?

Ri-ight. Is this all that you think about? Writing. Reading. What do you do when you’re not writing?

Go to school, take kids to school, try to find time to participate in the PTA, help my kids with homework, do my own homework, keep the house from burning down, help my husband with the farm, go to my kids’ soccer games, bake (if I’m extremely motivated) and work in my secret lab on a drug that will save us all if there is a zombie apocalypse. Sometimes I even cook dinner!

Again with the drugs…actually that xanax might do the trick. It would save us from worrying about it.

Soccer mom, huh? That sounds...fun. Wouldn’t you rather be doing that instead of writing? Writing takes SO long!

It’s agonizing, isn’t it? It truly does take FOR.EV.ER! Still, I love it and it gives me an outlet. If nothing else, at least I have that. “What are you thinking?” often pops into my head, but nothing ever happens if we give up. I don’t want to be that person.

“What are you thinking?” I want this to be your new mantra. Say it when you wake up. Say it every time you turn on your computer. I think you do want to be ‘that’ person, you just don’t know you do. This is why I am here.

But…. This cure for a zombie problem does deserve a lot of my attention as well.

**under breath** And we’re back to the drugs…

And apparently my kids soccer games deserve the attention to. I am a sucker for soccer.

If you could alter reality and take credit for having written one book, what book would that be?

You want me to pick something important right? Some sort of classic? Is Jane Eyre or Pride and Prejudice the right answer? **starting to sweat** Will I get kicked off the couch if I answer wrong?

**taking off glasses** Yes.

**couple deep breaths.** I’m going with either the Hunger Games series OR I would be Sandra Boynton and have written all her books.

Why?

‘Cause they are awesome! Why else? Should there be another reason?

No. Awesome is the best reason. If we were on Family Feud right now it would be the answer that most people gave.

Suzanne Collins and Sandra Boynton, huh?

I would have chosen The Autobiography of Benjamin Franklin or Everybody Poops. I guess we are entitled to our own opinions.

Can I suggest, Sandra Bullock instead of Sandra Boynton? Or Suzanne Somers instead of Suzanne Collins? Actors are SO much more sane than writers.

Leigh, you seem really normal compared with some of the other people who I’ve had on my couch.

Define normal? You just don’t know me well enough. I’m all sorts of “out-of-control.”

I guess I just mean you’re not as crazy as Dave Farland, aka King Wiz. But probably with time you’ll become just as crazy.

Once you get to know me you may try to avoid me. I often break out in dance or song, not caring where I am or who I’m with. And I have no intention of dancing or singing with talent. I just let it out when the feeling hits.

This sounds a lot like Musical Theater. You should consider Musical Theater. Avoid the crazies in writing, go into Musical Theater. You know what? You seem nice. We should get some Jamba Juice sometime and chat when I’m not charging you.

You like me? You really like me! I am all about mango-a-go-go or a razzmatazz. As long as you are cool if I dance and sing, then I am all for it. Love me some Jamba, especially with Shelly and no service fees!

OK, cool. Your time is up. Be sure to pay the receptionist on your way out.

Thanks for the session Shelly. You couch is more comfortable now. Aren’t you going to give me a prescription of some sort???

Really you might need to kick this drug thing, Leigh. Unfortunately that’s not what I do here on Shelly’s Therapy Hour, I’m not a 12 step…not yet at least.

But here is some ‘counsel’

-Hugs not drugs. Watch THIS VIDEO, it might help.

-Remember “What am I thinking?”

-Bake me some cookies for our next session.

-And for heaven sakes, stop writing while you can. There is still hope for you.

-If you HAVE to write then go back into the closet. It’s cramped, dark, and uncomfortable in there and eventually you will quit all together. You will have to trust me on this.

-And Jamba Juice, next Friday, while the kids are in school?


Thanks Leigh for playing along!
Does Leigh look a lot like the super nice blogger, Abby Fowers? Well she IS! 
Here is her new (beautiful) blog Leigh Covington

Just so that everybody knows, she does not do drugs or obsess about them. That was me putting words into her drug-free mouth.

Or follow her here TWITTER 
FACEBOOK

27 comments:

  1. What a crazy fun interview. So many Zombies. Who would've thought?

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  2. OMG, this was hilarious! HILARIOUS!!!!

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  3. This interview is pure genius! And I'm an absolute fan of your guy's humor. Abby and Shelly, you just rocked my morning! :)

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  4. I'm kind of worried about Abby. I think she might have a drug problem. Maybe we should stage an intervention :)

    Seriously great interview!

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  5. Shelly, this was SO.MUCH.FUN! Thanks for letting me in on your therapy hour. I feel so much better now!

    And if we want to do an intervention with jamba juice, I am all about having some writer buddies get together! ;)

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  6. Leigh's first interview, nice! I love you Abby, I mean, Leigh. Great interview ladies!

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  7. So I laughed pretty much the whole way through this. :) Great interview!

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  8. Hilar! I love the new pen name and I loved the interview! Awesome. Still laughing. Ow, my sides!

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  9. Everyone needs to read this for dialogue lessons. Truly amazing stuff.

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  10. Thanks for stopping by my blog. New follower. --What a fun blog you have ..I'll have to come back later when I have more time and read more.

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  11. This interview SO made me laugh. Loved it! Creating drugs for the zombie apocalypse....bahahaha!!

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  12. Ha ha! Love it. You both are brilliant! :D

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  13. You guys should get paid for this kind of banter! So great.

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  14. Ditto the last comment... although don't come looking to me for money. Black Friday left me in the red :)

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  15. That was a great amount of awesomeness all in just one spot. Way to go you two.

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  16. You guys are so awesome. I love both of you! :D

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  17. What a fun post. I like this blog!

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  18. What fun! What fun! What fun! You're both spectacular ladies! Shelly's Therapy Hour is the Paris of Blogging - everyone's dying to visit!

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  19. Fun and enjoyable interview - I think I snorted my coffee a couple of times. <3

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  20. Okay, I meant 'snorted my coffee out of my nose' not ACTUALLY snorted my coffee. :D

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  21. Thanks for the link Shelley. It explains so much. Abby has Leigh hostage out of a ZombusEatusPhobia. If we can get Abby to calm down and accept the best solution to the Zombie apocalypse is a machete, then she'll set Leigh free!

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